Today in the United States we are celebrating Thanksgiving—a holiday where families get together all across America to give thanks for the good things in their lives. So as I reflect on my life today, here are the top 5 things I am most thankful for…
#1 Jesus
That might sound to some like the trite Christian answer, but I really am serious. I still remember the day at 16 years old where Jesus ceased to be a religious figure and became my saviour. I am 36 years old today, and he continues to be the most treasured thing in my life.
I am so thankful for Jesus—my God who became flesh, lived the righteous life I should have lived, suffered and died for my sin, and rose from death to give me hope for a future resurrection.
#2 My wife
Day in and day out my beautiful wife gives herself to care for our family in a way that makes me thankful for her more than anyone else. Thank you Megan—for how you love us all selflessly, and serve us every day. I love you and thank God for you.
#3 My children
Before we had our first child I really had no idea how strong a father’s love could feel. My three little girls bring me constant joy, and I so enjoy striving along with Megan to provide for them a good foundation for their future life—a foundation of love in which Jesus is the cornerstone.
#4 Our families
I am so thankful for our families, especially our parents who have given of themselves to us time-after-time without asking for anything in return—except that we live our lives for Jesus. The last few years would have been especially difficult without them.
#5 My health
And finally, I am so thankful for my health. Exactly one week ago today I had back surgery for a ruptured disc in my spine that was causing unbearable pain. I cannot express how thankful I am today to be able to sit here typing pain free. I hope never to take good health for granted again and to treat this body of mine with more respect—to steward it better.
So there you have it—the things I am most thankful for today.
Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
About 4 weeks ago, in fact the day after our mammoth drive through the White Mountains, I started to feel pain in my lower back. It was uncomfortable at first, but not debilitating. During the week though the pain got steadily worse until by the weekend I could barely walk. The only pain free position I could get into was lying flat on the floor—and apart from a couple of days of respite due to a high dose of steroids, I have been unable to walk more than a few feet since then without experiencing agonising pain.
Last week I had an MRI taken of my back that has confirmed I have a herniated disc (a prolapsed disc for my British readers) in my spine that is pressing on the sciatic nerve and causing the throbbing and shooting pain I feel from my lower back all the way down my right leg.
Today is day 20 and the pain is slowly getting worse. I cannot get pain free even lying flat any more. For the last two nights I have not slept more than 4 hours before waking with the pain. I am confined to my bedroom and can just make it to the bathroom and back before needing to collapse on the floor, experiencing pain that brings me to tears.
I am daily praying to Jesus to heal me. Sometimes it is more like pleading through tears than it is a confident prayer of faith. I just want the pain to go.
But in the midst of all this I know Jesus is with me and I’m learning a lot. When pain is a constant companion there is a real temptation to get angry with God. After all if he is sovereign and he loves me, and if he really can heal miraculously—then why did he allow this to happen, and why doesn’t he now stop it? This was the same temptation that Job faced in his suffering, which was to curse God (Job 2:1-10)—to blame him, and get angry with him.
So how should we respond to God when living with pain 24 hours a day? What should the attitude of our heart be, and what can we do practically to walk through it with Jesus? These are the questions that I am going to try and answer in my next few blog posts—as I face the present reality of life with Jesus and pain myself.
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